My heart is so sad at work tonight. My mind is on my mom. This is my first night back to work in 2 weeks and I am not quite connecting to my patients. I am sure tomorrow night will be much better. My daughter has also been on my mind as well. As much as I love being silly with her, I think we may have taken the silly a bit too far. Tonight, we had to talk about what can be said at school (as in certain words) an what is for home. This parenting thing is a lot of responsibility. Just because momma calls you were little sweet potato does not mean you get to call your friends muffiin heads. But oh I love her.
Spending a lot of my free time in prayer today. I am praying that every breath, every ounce of life is focused on glorifying God. I want my goal each day to further the kingdom of God. I do not say that lightly. I want to offer an encouraging word instead of instantly judging someone. I hate that I do that. I hate that I use the excuse that it is human nature. I hate that I compare myself to those who seem to have it together in the church world. I am truly jealous of those who spread joy everywhere. Oh I want that to be a natural part of my life. I can get there. I just need to change my thoughts and perceptions.
So if you read this, please pray for my heart. Pray that I can get off my tush and be the difference maker I so desire to be. That I can be the person God created me for and not be afraid of chasing after that goal.
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